Untitled Document

Fear Number One

Why is it that I am interested in the love affairs of the others while I myself doesn't have one...the fear of feeling the problems that they feel...a cowardly way of saying, It's a good thing I didn't have any relationship...but deep inside my heart feels jealousy...I wanted to love...to be loved...but I hinder myself from having and doing so...

I grieve every time I see people holding hands...hugging...Public Display of Affection...yeah right...but in private places you'll hear quarrels and misunderstanding...it makes love more tight they say...sez who? if it does why are there break ups and annulments?

Here I go again with my pessimistic statements...but then again, It's better than being sorry...or is it?

I'm really confused right now...

What is true love? Sharing affections without asking anything back? loving without looking at any material obsession or physical attraction...a love of only emotions and affections guys...dream on....

Maybe I'm just lonely....or maybe just longing for someone...is there? you tell me...hehe...ahem...or maybe I just need a love doctor...is there such?

**I felt something bothering me one time...somehow I felt something wrong...not the usual feeling I'm having...my chest feels tight...I could clearly feel and hear the beat of my heart...I tried to seek help...I wanted to ask someone...I need a check up...there's this one girl in my mind...but her face is not clear...everything's a blur...unfortunately along the way, I felt bad...the card says at the door, the doctor is [out]...I need a remedy...I need it quick...

As I walk along the shores of love...
the waves kept pushing me back...
Suddenly everything became calm...
not knowing I'm drowning...
it's shallow...
yet hard to survive...
Ocean deep...
**

"The night fell at8:08 PM"
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